The Drive of My Life - by Kevin

Wasagiant blog was created ever since my buddies started asking me about starting a blog about my condition and the progress so that all loved ones would be able keep abreast of the updates. However, being a shy giant and not quite a writer, I asked my wife Linda to take up the editorial role instead. And always being there for me, she never hesitated on taking the task despite of my never-ending list of requests. And time and time again, she never failed me and done an excellent job indeed. So after almost 6 months, I decided to post this (my first one!! hehe) and after given a long thought about it, I came up with this title "The Drive of Life".

When I was first diagnosed with GCT (Germ Cell Tumor), it did not really hit me that hard as I was still in a blurr state of mind, after undergoing all that surgeries and scans in Mount Alvernia. Even then, with the help of family members, friends and relatives, it still did not hit me as hard as everyone tells me that it is curable, there's hope and even giving support by offering financial help, stories of cancer survivors, all kinds of remedies that would help, etc. I really appreciate all the support and care given. However, when the breaking news of "Mr. Yeo, your cancer markers are not falling as we expected.........", "The tumor is not reacting to the chemotherapy treatment.....", Your chances now are only........" strikes, that really hit me hard like Mike Tyson just gave you an uppercut! So hard that I really don't know what's next and even worse, can I really face it this time? Crying was not the only thing on my mind......... giving up was!

All this while, I have always taken a lot of things too carefreely (is there such a word?!) and sometimes for granted. During the first 3 months, I complained about the smallest things and not looking at the bigger picture. The last two months kept me thinking hard, going back the memory lane and creating a mind-collage of the good times and bad times....... and then the future...... is there a future for me? Only God knows. Everyone tells me to 'keep the spirit flying', 'think positive', 'you can surpass this', encouraging words...... well, initially spirits were high until the "breaking news" (you know what I mean) when spirits started to plunge to its all-time lowest point. Then I remembered, my friend Brandon did ask me when I was first warded in SGH, "What are you going to do if you pass this hurdle?" "How do you see life now?" "What can you do to share with others of this experience?"...... Hmmmm....... Does life only seem so important when you were hit by a crisis?

My life had changed the day I was diagnosed with GCT, do I regret it? I will be bluffing if I say no, but I accept it! The last 6-month journey had been truly an experience for me but really a blessed one! Blessed one because I truly discovered the love and touch of Christ. Friends whom really know me, knows that I am not a religious person, not even until last year! (I would not say that I am pious now, but my Faith in GOD and his Son Jesus Christ is increasingly stronger each day!). All this thanks to the Lord, everyone's prayers, guidance from Lynette (my sis in law), Siang (my bro in law), Pastor Jack & Angie and my beloved wife, Linda.

I really would like to put forward this special thanks in this blog to all whom has driven me stronger in fighting this great battle of mine. Firstly, the Lord for all things are only made possible through Him. Secondly, my wife, Linda whom has always been the pillar of strength throughout my life. My family, Dad, Mum and sis for always being there. My parents in-law and siblings-in-law, for their endless care and support. My buddies for their friendship. Relatives and friends for their encouragement and well wishes. The SGH medical team for their care.

Thank you for your prayers and contributions!

I have learned that with faith in the Lord, positive thinking and showered with so much love and blessings from your loved ones, nothing else could be more important in life.